If I

If I just had the answer
I wouldn't ask anymore
If I just had a reason
I would close that door

If I was smarter
I would know what it means
If I was faster
I'd get her before she leaves

If I just had the time
I would do it
If I just had the words
I would say it

If I was closer
I would know what it is
If I was tougher
It wouldn’t hurt like this

BYE

I thought I loved you

But now I’m not sure

I’ve started to hate you

And I can’t find a cure.

Don’t care you like me

Don’t care you want me

In the end, someone else has you

In the end, I will never have you.

I loved everything you did

But now I just hate it

I used to love it

But It’s always the same shit.

Tell me you’re going away

I don’t wanna see you cry

I’m sure I’ll find a way

To end this fucking lie.

Questions

What do I want to die for?
What do I have to die for?
What do I want to live for?
What do I have to live for?
Who do I want to live for?
Who do I have to live for?
Who do I have to die for?

hmmm, Who do I want to die for?

Speechless

No words could explain
What it's like
To be so certain
But so disliked

No word from my mouth
Could say what I mean
There's just a dark cloud
When I try to come clean

I stare at my black veins
Looking for a change
All I see are stains
Coming from my brain

cry

I wish I could cry but I just can't
I Might have reasons to cry
It seems I forgot how to cry
It's been a while since my last tear

I wish I can get you out of my head
little by little on every single teardrop
That's why I want to cry
but actually, I don't wanna cry

I just don't wanna think about you anymore

A Little Happy

I have no reason to say I'm happy. The more I know this fucking world , the unhappier I am.
It seems I've adapted myself very well, but I feel like I'm giving a lot and getting nothing.I just want to get something that makes me happy, ANYTHING¡¡¡¡.It could be an ear that understands what I say, Not these ears around me pretending to be listening. It could be a mouth speaking up for itself, not these mouths around me shouting what they're supposed to say.It could be an eye seeing through all lies not these eyes around me blinded by the people.

Anyway , I know I ain't gonna get any of those things cause I'm an outsider.Actually that makes me a little happy.